PAREIDOLIA...HUH?

Par-ei-do-lia: the tendency to perceive a specific, often meaningful image in a random or ambiguous visual pattern. Think of cloud gazing: you stare up at the sky and suddenly you see a dragon, a face, an animal, or a person dancing in the clouds. Your mind fills in the blanks.

When I was a teenager taking art classes, my Russian art teacher had a strict method. We spent hours copying the works of the old masters-studying every brushstroke, every shadow, every hue. His philosophy was that through mastering technique, true artistic freedom could emerge. 

For years, I chased that kind of perfection, especially in portrait realism. I believed realistic art was more "valuable," more respected, more real. Every single time after I would finish a piece, it rarely felt good enough.

Don't get me wrong-I still deeply admire hyperrealistic work. There's magic in seeing a painting that looks like it could breathe. But for me, that level of control became creatively paralyzing.

I've since fallen in love with abstract expression. Letting go has brought me back to joy.

Yes, I still labour over my compositions, but I'm no longer chasing flawlessness. I'm chasing feeling. I AM CHASING PRESENCE.

Painting in a pareidolic style is like inviting the viewer to sit next to me on that metaphorical bench and cloud-gaze together. You're free to see what you want to see. I'm not dictating the meaning-I'm offering a portal. A quiet space to feel whatever arises.

 

 When I was taking art classes as a teenager, my Russian art teacher was very big on us copying works of old painting masters in order to learn their painting techniques. His goal for us was to master how they apply every brush stroke, their use of colour and how it creates an illusion of something that is three dimensional on a two dimensional substrate. His way of teaching, what felt like to me at that time, was first you become a machine at perfecting the technique, then you can have your freedom in creativity. I have spent years chasing that perfection with portraiture and realism. I have spent years believing that realistic art is far more superior than abstract, contemporary, etc. When I would paint a subject, I would agonize over it's realism on my canvas and when it was done, it still seemed that it was not good enough. Don't get me wrong, I still love seeing artworks where you feel that you can just pluck the subject off the page, but when it comes to me, that level of control is paralyzing to my creativity.

           I love abstract! I find so much joy in letting go, even though I still labour over my composition, I am not attached to the perfection in the final result.

Pareidolia is essentially “cloud gazing” and seeing what you want to see. Painting in that style allows me to share with a viewer what I am feeling without forcing their hand to feel the same, but rather invite them to have seat on that bench and cloud gaze with me. They are encouraged to see what they want to see and feel the feelings that arise.